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We are back!!

Discussion in 'The Atrium' started by Heatherthepackgirl, Aug 21, 2007.

  1. Heatherthepackgirl

    Heatherthepackgirl Cheesehead

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    Hi everyone!! We just returned from Wisconsin where we had a nice visit with my parents, brother and sister. My Mom has alzheimers so she isnt doing so well. But I have to admit she is doing better then I thought she would be. We spend some quality time with all of them we also went to Green Bay last week Tuesday and Thursday. Tuesday we went to the atrium and did the stadium tour, we ate at Curly's Pub. I also recieved some autographs from players we had a blast. Thursday we got there in the afternoon we were at the gate again for some autographs and also caught a training camp practice which was awesome. We took many many pictures.

    I must say Aaron Rodgers and Bodiford are so great in giving autographs and funny to. We asked both of them for a picture and they posed with us. I got to shake Donald Drivers hand as he was passing through on a bike hes always so nice. I shook many hands. I am off to work but will write more of what we did back there when I have alittle more time.

    Again it was hard for us to say good bye to my family, I cried all the way to the airport it was a very hard good bye. But someday we will be moving back cant wait for that day.

    Have a great day all my friends
    Heather
     
  2. PackerChick

    PackerChick Cheesehead

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    Welcome home Heather. Glad to have you back on the board. Best wishes to your ma.
     
  3. Zero2Cool

    Zero2Cool I own a website

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  4. Heatherthepackgirl

    Heatherthepackgirl Cheesehead

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    Thanks Packerchick and Zero!!! Hopefully we can move back to WI in a year so that I can help my DAd out with my Mom..its surely hard seeing someone that you love so much end up like that after working so hard her whole life...But thanks for the kind wishes and Im glad to be back on here with all of you once again...
     
  5. vikesrule

    vikesrule Cheesehead

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    Heather

    Glad you enjoyed your time with your family.

    I can relate with what you are going through with your mother. My mother passed away in 2002 after a 10 year battle with alzheimers.
    It was the toughest thing that I ever dealt with. After my father passed away, I tried to take care of my mother, but after a year, it just became too hard.
    My sisters an I had to put her in a nursing home (very tough). She looked at me and said " Why are you doing this to me". That was incredibly tough.
    Watching your mother slowly lose all sense of reality is beyond description.

    One of the best things that I read duirng this time was a book, "A Long Goodbye and Beyond" Coping with Alzheimer's by Linda Combs

    This is a brief from it, and is is a good visual metaphor of alzheimer's.

    "Alzheimer's is indeed a disease that causes a loved one to fall apart one piece at a time.
    On one day you see your loved one and some of the pieces seem to be back in place.
    But, the next day they have disappeared again, along with perhaps a new missing piece.
    Sometimes there are barely enough pieces left to recognize the person that they used to be.
    Sadly, eventually all the pieces are lost, at least in this world."


    I wish you the very best in dealing with your mothers care.
    May God guide you.
     
  6. Heatherthepackgirl

    Heatherthepackgirl Cheesehead

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    Thanks Vikesrule!! Gosh I was crying reading this. Its very tough, so far she is just asking the same questions over and over again, but I do know it will only get worse, thats why I need to move back closer to them so I can help if need be. Everyone of course is sad about my Mom but when I look at my Dad, hes under so much stress right now and I dont know how long he will be able to handle her and then I worry about him. How many years did your Mom live with Alzheimers Vikesrule? I know this disease can be a slow process or a very short one.

    I talked to my Dad last night on the phone, and he says that Mom thinks we are still in WI and when he says we are back in CA she cries but she has asked this question over and over again. Makes me so sad to be in CA and not there with them. When leaving I cried all the way to the airport, I cried the next day, so everyday I have to try to not think about them which is very hard. But hopefully in a year we can be back there.

    I will most definately get that book thanks for telling me about it. :)

    Yes, we had a great visit in WI, mostly just sitting at the kitchen table with my parents being its hard on my Dad to take my Mom anywheres because when he gets her someplace like a resturant or visiting friends or family she makes a scene and wants to go home, she may just get someplace sits down and she thinks she has been there for many hours and then demands to go home. Its very difficult. The sad part of it is my parents havent been to CA to visit us and may now never get here. I think putting my MOm on plane might be tough to keep her entertained for that long and she cant just ask to go home. Its definately been tough on me being so far away from them.

    AGain thanks everyone for your prayers!!! I will keep everyone posted.
     
  7. Pack93z

    Pack93z You retired too? .... Not me. I'm in my prime

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    VR and Heather.... I had a hard time reading your whole posts without shedding a tear or many. I have never been so unfortunate to have been directly affected by this disease itself within my family, which I thank God for. Watching someone fade before your eyes and not being able to do anything but be there for them, is unbelievably painful.

    But to read your stories, all I can say is how unbelievably strong you both are. I truly believe illness to loved ones is the hardest thing a person ever would have to face in their lifetime.

    Thanks for sharing your stories and God bless both your families.
     
  8. cheesey

    cheesey Cheesehead

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    Hedder.........I'm SO glad that you got to spend some time with your Mom! I KNOW how scared you were.
    I'm sorry i wasn't able to hook up with you and Edder this time around. Hopefully soon you will live here, and we can see each other on a more often basis.
     
  9. Heatherthepackgirl

    Heatherthepackgirl Cheesehead

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    Thanks Pack!!! It is very hard knowing whats around the corner for my Mom and Dad and for our family. Thanks for your prayers my friend!! Glad I have a place like this to come to.
     
  10. Heatherthepackgirl

    Heatherthepackgirl Cheesehead

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    Its okay Cheesy, every place we went without my parents I felt guilty I only see them once a year sometimes only once in two years so I wanted to spend every minute I could with them. We had a great visit my Mom wont no longer take my phone calls so I hadnt talked to my Mom in two years, everytime I needed a person to talk to it was her I would call and now I dont have that. The good news is my Dad and I talk more now but its still not the same as talking to my Mom. Even being back there I couldnt have a conversation with her because she would forget what I had just said. So I gave my parents lots of hugs and kisses and told them how much I missed them and how much I loved them both and for making me the person I am today. We have always been a close family but when I moved out to CA that of course stopped cause I couldnt see them whenever I wanted to.

    Sorry everyone for going on and on about my parents. But I am hanging in there and yes Cheesy we plan on moving back hopefully in the next year if all goes well. And yes for sure we will get together whenever we want to then be fun.
     
  11. vikesrule

    vikesrule Cheesehead

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    Don't feel badly about discussing your feelings on this issue Heather, it is good to express yourself.

    Not to make you feel badly, but hopefully enlighten people as to the insidious nature of this disease, a little more of what my mother went through.

    Basically, she spent 10 years in a slowly sliding regression from life.
    I think that it was a little longer, but my father when he was still alive covered for her as best that he could.

    It started out with forgetting what happened yesterday, but could remember earlier things. As time progressed, the forgetfulness went back further and further until there was no memory of anything or anyone.

    Another aspect, besides the memory loss, was a drastic change in personality.
    For all of my mothers life, she was a deeply religious woman, didn't drink, never ever swore, had great compassion for all and never raised a hand or voice to anyone.
    A few years into this slide from reality, she went through several phases. one of which was becoming greatly agitated. She would swear and lash out at people. This was so contrary to her real self.

    Paranoia was another shift from her former self. Another one of the phases, she believed that everone was stealing from her and out to get her.

    In the last couple of years of her life, when I would look into her once sparkling blue eyes that now just stared blankly, I prayed for God just to take her.
    May God forgive me for that.

    There is much more to this, but I will leave it there.

    As to how to deal with it, that is a tough one. There is no easy way, and sadly there is not anything that you can do to change it.
    The best thing that you can do, is to be the best person possible. That is what your mother wanted most.
    And lastly, your father needs your support as much if not more than your mother does. He is dealing with this 24/7 and watching the woman that he has spent his entire adult life with, slowly slip away is devastatling.

    To lighten it up a little, when the times get tough, remember all of the good things....that will be your mothers legacy!
    Life is good, enjoy every moment!!

    And Pack93z, thanks for the thoughts!
     
  12. Heatherthepackgirl

    Heatherthepackgirl Cheesehead

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    Thanks for all the info Vikerule!!! When ever I needed someone to talk to my Mom was the first person that I called but for the last two years she has not wanted to talk on the phone to anyone so before we went back to WI I hadnt talked to my Mom in two years thats the hard part of living so far away. But now you cant have a conversation with her anyways she forgets what you had just said.

    I do remember the good times and good things cause that is all I have left.

    When you see anyone suffer you pray for god to take them because they arent the same person you knew and with this disease you dont know if they are suffering or not. They end up being a person that is a complete stranger to you. Its rough.

    God has forgiven you Vikerule, we dont ever want to see our loved ones suffer.

    Thanks everyone for all your prayers.
     
  13. cheesey

    cheesey Cheesehead

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    Aww Vikes..........God forgives you! He knows your Mom wasn't really there anymore anyway. My Mom spent the last month or so of her life in a vegatative state. I prayed that He would take her and not make her suffer anymore. He knows that you only wanted release from her destroyed body in this life!
    Hedder, I'm so glad that your Mom knew who you were! I was worried that she would be too far gone to know. I'm sure glad that you got to spend some real quality time with her!
     
  14. Heatherthepackgirl

    Heatherthepackgirl Cheesehead

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    Hopefully this disease dont progress to fastly before we get back there permanently, it would be devastating if she wouldnt know me but I do know its coming and thats part of this disease.

    Its just so hard for me to see older people suffer, they work hard during their lifetime and then they end up like this back to a little child that needs to be taken care of. Thats with Cancer or any disease thats why I wished I was rich I would put tons of money towards good charities and for research. I would feel then like I am helping more.

    I did Cheesy miss seeing you when we were there, but the time will come where we wont live so far apart and we can see each other whenever.
     

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