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The Continuing Two Sentence Story

Discussion in 'The Atrium' started by I_am_smoked_cheddar, Jul 20, 2012.

  1. I_am_smoked_cheddar

    I_am_smoked_cheddar Guest

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    Once there was a Dairyman named Jason who lived on a small farm in Wisconsin. One day Jason was milking his cows when in walked a tall, thin man wearing a lite gray suit and carrying a black briefcase.
     
  2. Vltrophy

    Vltrophy Cheesehead

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    He walked up to Jason & introduced himself as Mr. Maroni. I'm your late great uncle Marks lawyer.
     
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  3. I_am_smoked_cheddar

    I_am_smoked_cheddar Guest

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    Your great uncle has named you Jason in his will. He was a wealthy man and has left you the Minnesota NFL franchise to do with as you please.
     
  4. Wood Chipper

    Wood Chipper Fantasy Football Guru

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    Jason immediately stripped down to his underpants. He then proceeded to his girlfriends house to tell her the big news.
     
  5. I_am_smoked_cheddar

    I_am_smoked_cheddar Guest

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    On the way to his girlfriends house, Jason is arrested for indecent exposure and released on $1,000.00 bond. Meanwhile in Minnesota, a dark plot is being formed to wrest the team from Jason by the evil Brother-in-law of Jason's great uncle, Henry Brownnose !
     
  6. Wood Chipper

    Wood Chipper Fantasy Football Guru

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    Henry Brownnose was watching WWE and got inspired to wrestle Jason for the team. Jason said he would only participate if it was a steel cage match.
     
  7. Vltrophy

    Vltrophy Cheesehead

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    During the steel cage match the 2 are hard at it beating on each other for 30 min. Brownnose body slams Jason & begins climbing the steel cage to try & get out.
     
  8. I_am_smoked_cheddar

    I_am_smoked_cheddar Guest

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    Jason(Smart) gets to his feet, grabs Brownnose, and throws him into the side of the cage whereupon Jason pins him. For winning the match, Jason gets Brownnose's Microsoft Stock and keeps the team.
     
  9. Wood Chipper

    Wood Chipper Fantasy Football Guru

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    Jason then tries to sell his Minnesota NFL team and Microsoft stock but there are no takers. He then proceeds to take a large dump that has him crying in pain.
     
  10. I_am_smoked_cheddar

    I_am_smoked_cheddar Guest

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    Meanwhile, Jason's girlfriend(Rose) has been talking with the NFL Commissioner about the team. The Commissioner has agreed to allow the team to relocate to L.A. after a new Stadium is built.
     
  11. AmishMafia

    AmishMafia Cheesehead

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    It is at this time that Jason's Girlfriend discovers she is pregnant from her fling with Jason's Uncle's evil twin, Brett. As she runs outside, shocked at the news, she runs directly into a large monkey wearing an Elvis suit and climbing out of a flying saucer.
     
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  12. I_am_smoked_cheddar

    I_am_smoked_cheddar Guest

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    Rose, frightened by her brother Jerry playing a prank on her, miscarries the baby. Jason meanwhile, discovers that Rose was drugged and taken advantage of, forgives Rose and turns his attention back to his NFL franchise.
     
  13. Wood Chipper

    Wood Chipper Fantasy Football Guru

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    Jason (scared by the injury) decided, in typical Minnesota fashion, to trade his star RB to the New England NFL franchise.
     
  14. I_am_smoked_cheddar

    I_am_smoked_cheddar Guest

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    Having freed up lots of cap space with the trade, Jason hires the L.A. law firm of Dewy,Cheatum, & Howe to start work to get an L.A. Stadium built. The first thing will be to bribe the local officials in L.A., not a hard thing to do.
     
  15. Kitten

    Kitten Feline Cheesehead Staff Member Super Moderator

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    In L.A. Jason learns he is being investigated by the FBI for bribing local L.A. officials. The FBI secretly wants to get their hands on franchise to investigate internal corruption.
     
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  16. I_am_smoked_cheddar

    I_am_smoked_cheddar Guest

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    Jason returns to his farm, only to discover that his cows are missing. His nephew Jethro has been tending to the cows in his absence, so there must be a good explanation !

    vmsvfnsvs.jpg
     
  17. AmishMafia

    AmishMafia Cheesehead

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    "They was vitttles" Jethrow explains, rubbing his enormous belly." Neither man could believe their eyes as Rose strolled in with a tuba and a pet monkey, pausing before she spoke.
     
  18. I_am_smoked_cheddar

    I_am_smoked_cheddar Guest

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    It's my Great Grandfather's birthday and the town band and I will be saluting John Philip Sousa tonight by playing his music from the bandstand in Griffin Park. Mrs. Ward has cleaned and repaired all of our uniforms and the Mayor will be Conducting as always.
     
  19. Wood Chipper

    Wood Chipper Fantasy Football Guru

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    Meanwhile in Henry Brownnoses lair... Henry has been mulling over the loss he had at the hand of Jason.
     
  20. I_am_smoked_cheddar

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    Boiling mad, Brownnose has secretly contacted his friend in Mexico City, Raul Rodriguez (RRod) for his special kind of help. Back on the farm, everyone is ready to go to the Griffin Park Concert, as they all enter the large mini-van we here Dave(Jasons new bodyguard and driver) say....
     
  21. Wood Chipper

    Wood Chipper Fantasy Football Guru

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    "I have to make a quick stop by the 7-11 to get some gas". As Dave goes inside to pay for the gas, Jason is kidnapped by a group of foreigners and taken back to their hideout.
     
  22. AmishMafia

    AmishMafia Cheesehead

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    Raul sat at breakfast contemplating the request for his special services. He knew he would help brownnose, but it had been years since he was in porn and his favorite goat had died last year.
     
  23. NACHOMAN

    NACHOMAN Sailing the seas of cheese

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    Raul, was formerly known as The Spanish Fly Rod in the porn industry. He was the mastermind of a HGH (human growth hormone) smuggling operation, which would transport and deliver goats stuffed with balloons to farms in the Northeastern United States.
     
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  24. AmishMafia

    AmishMafia Cheesehead

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    Meanwhile, Jason finally has the mask removed by the kidnappers, and finds himself tied to a chair, surrounded by 3 large rough looking guys. The meanest one of the bunch removed his cigar from his mouth, blew the smoke into Jason's face as he asked, "Where are the goats?"
     
  25. Wood Chipper

    Wood Chipper Fantasy Football Guru

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    Jason spit in cigar mans face and laughed. He then proceeded to sing "I'm just a teenage dirtbag baby".
     

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