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PackOne Limerick Contest !

Discussion in 'Packer Fan Forum' started by PackOne, May 21, 2007.

  1. PackOne

    PackOne Cheesehead

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    Last year I had the opportunity to enter the MontanaBob limerick contest on this site. Somehow, I managed to win the darn thing, and MontanaBob awarded me with some fabulous prizes from his home state of Montana.

    After clearing it with Mr. Bob, I have decided to pass on the tradition with this years PackOne limerick contest. I too will offer the winner some fabulous prizes from my home state of Wisconsin. (yeah) I also own a custom art and frame store, so the winner can expect a one of a kind Packer piece - along with other prizes chosen at my discretion.

    Montana's only stipulation was that the limerick continued to revolve around the Vikings.

    Although he doesn't know it yet - I will be asking Raider Pride to assist me in judging. Silently, I have always respected him as a poster in this forum. I will also ask Montana for is final approval of a winner. For those not familiar with a limerick format I have posted the rules below.

    A limerick is a five-line poem with a strict meter, popularized by Edward Lear. The rhyme scheme is usually "A-A-B-B-A". The first, second, and fifth lines are three metrical feet (9 syllables); the third and fourth are two metrical feet (One metrical foot is equal to 3 syllables; the line pattern goes 9-9-6-6-9). The foot used is usually the amphibrach, a stressed syllable between two unstressed ones. However, many substitutions are common, notably the anapestic foot, two short syllables and then a long (the reverse of dactyl rhythm).

    The first line traditionally introduces a person and a location, and usually ends with the name of the location, though sometimes with that of the person. A true limerick is supposed to have a kind of twist to it. This may lie in the final line, or it may lie in the way the rhymes are often intentionally tortured, or in both. Though not a strict requirement, many limericks additionally show some form of internal rhyme, often alliteration, sometimes assonance or another form of rhyme. In early limericks, the last line often essentially repeated the first, though that is no longer customary.


    I will give everyone the first line and the rest is up to you. I put alot of thought into this so don't let me down. The contest will run until the last tick of the clock in the first pre-season game.

    And the first line is ....

    There once was a Vike from Nantucket.

    AMENDMENT: Due to the limited amount of words that correctly rhyme with Nantucket, the producers of this contest will allow limericks that begin with the location of your choice ... such as -

    There once was a Vike from my bung hole.
    Looked just like the waste in my T-Bowl.
    He smelled worse than my arse.
    He teams talent quite sparse.
    Caged him with my pigs like a stink pole.

    -OR-

    There once was a Vike from south 'Sota.
    Drove round in a purple toyota.
    Just a retard - quite weird.
    Like the clam with the beard.
    The bottom of earths status quota.


    Just a suggestion of course. Heh.
     
  2. Lare

    Lare Cheesehead

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    There once was a Vike from Nantucket
    who took an Onterrio plane junket.
    But right after the escalator,
    security found his Whizzinator.
    And since then his pot-to-piss-in has been a bucket.
     
  3. PackOne

    PackOne Cheesehead

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    I'll even introduce my own ...


    There once was a Vike from Nantucket.
    He moved from the land of K. Puckett.
    His Vikings were a shame.
    Not just bad, but real lame.
    Dropped 'trou' and tends burns from the carpet.


    PS Edited because I didn't want to steal the word bucket
     
  4. Lare

    Lare Cheesehead

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    There once was a Vike from Nantucket
    who went on a Lake Minnetonka cruise junket.
    But he plead to the court
    “Nothing indecent of the sort,
    all she asked was "Do you mind if I “s**k it?”





    Ok, I'm done. :beersign:
     
  5. vechenzo

    vechenzo Cheesehead

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    There once was a guy named Ted Thompson
    Who takes opportunities and stomps 'em
    He said with a groan
    As brett picked up the phone
    I will not trade for keyshawn johnson



    Haha that just came off the top of my head, didn't quite hit the syllable rule on all the lines, but real close=P
     
  6. vechenzo

    vechenzo Cheesehead

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    Ohhhh has to revolve around the vikings, thats like asking my cat to hang out in a really messy litter box, hrmmmm

    One night on the 'sota turnpike
    There rode a purple man on a bike
    His pants were pulled down
    Fans looked on with a frown
    (No.)84 Decided he might play tonight.
     
  7. yooperfan

    yooperfan Cheesehead

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    There once was a Vike from Nantucket
    Who had brow hair so long he would pluck it
    When there came talk of a bowl
    He would find a nice hole
    So when Cheesey threw that word out there he could duck it.
     
  8. PackerChick

    PackerChick Cheesehead

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    Not viking related, but this one was pretty good.
     
  9. Robin Yount

    Robin Yount Cheesehead

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    There once were some Vikes from Nantucket
    Who on one night whipped out their junkets
    As Mikey meathead screamed
    Smootsie sank with the team
    And they all continued to sucketh!
     
  10. cheesey

    cheesey Cheesehead

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    There was a team from the Twin Cities,
    That liked looking at women's titties,
    So off they did float, on a man's rented boat
    Which was frowned on by all the old biddies!
     
  11. yooperfan

    yooperfan Cheesehead

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    There once was a vike fan named weasey
    Who thought that that trophy came easy
    When it didn't come around
    On sex she'd expound
    And set her sights on poor Cheesey.
     
  12. cheesey

    cheesey Cheesehead

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    (Sung to the theme from "The Jeffersons")
    "Well we're movin' on up
    Outta Minnesota,
    where the Vike fans just sit and gloat-aaa
    Yeah were movin' on up
    outta Minnesotaaaa,
    Where our team justa floats on a BOAT-AaaaAAAAaaaaaaa!!!"
    (Weasey......LOLOLOL!!!) :rotflmao:
     
  13. digsthepack

    digsthepack Cheesehead

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    There once was a Queen from Nantucket,
    Who said, "Bitch on your knees and suck it!,
    In a public staircase, another Queenie disgrace,
    You'd think at some point the fans would say, "**** it".

    Based on the misadventures of Dwight Smith in a downtown club.
     
  14. vikesrule

    vikesrule Cheesehead

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    This thread is a clear violation of .....uh nevermind :sucks:

    There once was a man named Cheesey
    Who spilled some Gin on his weenie
    Just to be Couth
    He added Vermouth
    And slipped his chick a Martini!
     
  15. Pack93z

    Pack93z You retired too? .... Not me. I'm in my prime

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    More picking on the Vikes :Razz:

    There once was a Vike from Nantucket;
    Watching his team play like they were pissing in a bucket;
    Became so distraught and out of sorts;
    That he decided to change sports;
    And now pledges his support to Pawtucket.


    Yet another minor league team :rotflmao:
     
  16. cheesey

    cheesey Cheesehead

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    Cheesey and weenie don't ryhme!
    Now....if it was "Vikesrule" and "Weenie".......you could use either word, cause they both mean the same thing!LOLOLOL!!! :rotflmao:
     
  17. Pack93z

    Pack93z You retired too? .... Not me. I'm in my prime

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    ... See new version.
     
  18. cheesey

    cheesey Cheesehead

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    (Hope no one ever kicks ME in my "junket!".............whatever the heck that is!) :rotflmao:
     
  19. Bertram

    Bertram Cheesehead

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    There once was a Vike from Nantucket
    they called him the poor little muppet
    screaming for purple pride
    burning on the wrong side
    going to the dance like a puppet
     
  20. Green_Bay_Packers

    Green_Bay_Packers Cheesehead

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    hahahaha Good one Bertram
     
  21. PackOne

    PackOne Cheesehead

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    Did I mention this is a prize package valued at over 300 bucks. Let's hear some Vike bashing. I don't like to bump my own.
     
  22. cheesey

    cheesey Cheesehead

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    I thought i did pretty well!
    There's only so much you can say in 5 lines!
    Now....if it was open to full blown poems, i could go on and on!!!
     
  23. Green_Bay_Packers

    Green_Bay_Packers Cheesehead

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    yeah you could if it wasn't 5 lines The vikes cant be described in 5 lines
     
  24. cheesey

    cheesey Cheesehead

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    (Not without plenty of swear words!!!)LOLOLOL!!! :rotflmao:
     
  25. Packula

    Packula Cheesehead

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    There once was a team 'cross the 'Sippi
    Whose fans had become quite lippy
    But they jettisoned eighty-four
    Then showed Daunte the door
    Even Childress, like Tice, is just dippy
     

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