Johnson vs. Horse of course...

Pack93z

You retired too? .... Not me. I'm in my prime
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Good receiver just has a mouth that doesn't quit....

*Wishing horse trotted over and kicked him in the ****

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2007/football/nfl/06/09/johnson.horse.ap/index.html

Man beats beast
Cincy's Johnson outpaces racehorse in charity event

CINCINNATI (AP) -- Chad Johnson got a head start without having to jump offside, and beat his coverage to the goal line again.

The Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver was waiting at the finish line when Restore the Roar arrived at the end of his one-eighth-mile gallop. That's right: Johnson raced a horse Saturday and easily won.

Johnson was spotted a 100-meter lead -- roughly about half the distance the horse had to cover in the race for charity. And when it was over, Johnson, as usual, was anything but humble. He sounded ready to take on boxing, basketball and NASCAR.

"Floyd Mayweather, you're next," Johnson said. "I want to fight you. I'd like to take Kobe and LeBron one-on-one. Jeff Gordon, we can take a couple laps. ... Now it's my time to take over the race world."

The 4-year-old colt's jockey, P.J. Cooksey, rode a horse that beat former Bengals receiver Cris Collinsworth in 1993. She sounded more impressed with Johnson's speed.

"He's quick," Cooksey said. "He's a fast man. That was phenomenal. When I looked over at him, all I could see were his legs; they looked like a windmill. He was a blur. I was beat bad."
 

Zombieslayer

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Either Omni or Discover or one of those magazines was explaining how humans are the fastest land animals. We're the best at running long distances, and the funny this is, this was proven when they had a human vs a horse (with rider, or else horse has no incentive to run that far) 24 miles. The human won.

Humans will pursue and pursue. We'll eventually catch anything - antelope, deer, or whatever. We're even better than cheetas (who will overheat and simply stop until they cool down).

So the horse was lucky it was a short race. he would have had his *** kicked had it been a longer race.
 

cheesey

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Either Omni or Discover or one of those magazines was explaining how humans are the fastest land animals. We're the best at running long distances, and the funny this is, this was proven when they had a human vs a horse (with rider, or else horse has no incentive to run that far) 24 miles. The human won.

Humans will pursue and pursue. We'll eventually catch anything - antelope, deer, or whatever. We're even better than cheetas (who will overheat and simply stop until they cool down).

So the horse was lucky it was a short race. he would have had his *** kicked had it been a longer race.
WE are the fastest?
Wow.......i wish i would have known that when that bear was standing 27 yards in front of me.........if i knew i could have out ran him, i wouldn't have stood there yelling at him!
 

Zombieslayer

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Zombieslayer said:
Either Omni or Discover or one of those magazines was explaining how humans are the fastest land animals. We're the best at running long distances, and the funny this is, this was proven when they had a human vs a horse (with rider, or else horse has no incentive to run that far) 24 miles. The human won.

Humans will pursue and pursue. We'll eventually catch anything - antelope, deer, or whatever. We're even better than cheetas (who will overheat and simply stop until they cool down).

So the horse was lucky it was a short race. he would have had his *** kicked had it been a longer race.
WE are the fastest?
Wow.......i wish i would have known that when that bear was standing 27 yards in front of me.........if i knew i could have out ran him, i wouldn't have stood there yelling at him!

If you were racing the bear in a 20 mile race, you would have beaten him (if you're in good shape). In a short sprint on level ground, he'd beat you. Uphill, he'd beat you. Downhill, you'd beat him. So, the moral of this story is if you want to race a bear, either race him downhill or long distance.
 

cheesey

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cheesey said:
Zombieslayer said:
Either Omni or Discover or one of those magazines was explaining how humans are the fastest land animals. We're the best at running long distances, and the funny this is, this was proven when they had a human vs a horse (with rider, or else horse has no incentive to run that far) 24 miles. The human won.

Humans will pursue and pursue. We'll eventually catch anything - antelope, deer, or whatever. We're even better than cheetas (who will overheat and simply stop until they cool down).

So the horse was lucky it was a short race. he would have had his *** kicked had it been a longer race.
WE are the fastest?
Wow.......i wish i would have known that when that bear was standing 27 yards in front of me.........if i knew i could have out ran him, i wouldn't have stood there yelling at him!

If you were racing the bear in a 20 mile race, you would have beaten him (if you're in good shape). In a short sprint on level ground, he'd beat you. Uphill, he'd beat you. Downhill, you'd beat him. So, the moral of this story is if you want to race a bear, either race him downhill or long distance.
Well, in a short sprint i would have beat him, as he would have been slipping in the line of POOP i would be laying down behind me!!!! :rotflmao:
It actaully DID happen to me. I was bow hunting for deer, and had a HUGE bear come out of the woods straight for me. He wasn't running full speed, but wasn't walking either. So i didn't want him to get right up to me, and THEN realize i was there and feel cornered. So i stood up and YELLED at him. I know that running away can cause them to attack, so i decided to stand my ground. He stopped, his hair on his back stood up, and he "woofed" at me. So i kept waving my arms and yelling at him "Get outta here!!!" I had my buck knife in my hand, and i figured if he attacked me, I'd at least get a few hits into him before he killed me. He stood there for about 10 seconds, and then turned and ran. It amazed me how FAST he just dissapeared into the woods.
 
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Pack93z

Pack93z

You retired too? .... Not me. I'm in my prime
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If you were racing the bear in a 20 mile race, you would have beaten him (if you're in good shape). In a short sprint on level ground, he'd beat you. Uphill, he'd beat you. Downhill, you'd beat him. So, the moral of this story is if you want to race a bear, either race him downhill or long distance.

It is the part when he catches you in the short distance that would be the issue.... might be in no shape to run the other 19.5 miles... Cheesey you better wound him first, may I suggest a whole lot of tacks to throw behind you :)
 

cheesey

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I thought of trying to hit him with one of my arrows, but figured that would just **** him off!
Even if it hit him directly in the heart he would have still had time to rip me to shreds!
 

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