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Cheesey Jokes

Discussion in 'The Atrium' started by wpr, Apr 24, 2008.

  1. wpr

    wpr Cheesehead

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    I am tired of doing blonde jokes so here is a Cheesey Joke:

    Lie Detector
    A professor invented a lie detecting chair. Whenever anybody sitting in it told a lie, the chair would open up and dump the liar on the floor. During an experiment, Heathie sat in the chair and the professor asked her to tell about herself. She began, "I think you are the best teacher I've ever had." The chair immediately dumped her on the floor. After she left in a snit, Cheesey sat in the chair. The professor asked him to tell something of his life. He began, "I think -" The next thing he knew, he was sitting in the floor.
     
  2. Pack93z

    Pack93z You retired too? .... Not me. I'm in my prime

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    Way to go PC on us WRP.. :lol:

    Poor Cheesey.. :razz:
     
  3. wpr

    wpr Cheesehead

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    It is more about taking a shot at Cheesey than being PC. But it is only because I think, (oops good thing I am not a blonde. But then I am no longer very much of a brunette either. And I am getting to be less and less of one as the days go by.) Cheesey is a great guy and he can take it.
     
  4. Pack93z

    Pack93z You retired too? .... Not me. I'm in my prime

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    LOL.. yep it was a joke.. kind of like the many faces of Cheesey thread.. playful fun.. Cheesey style. ;)
     
  5. trippster

    trippster Cheesehead

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    Cheesey and Montana bob were walking down a road in rural (as if there is anything but) Montana. They passed in front of a ranch with a home with a fenced in yard and a sign that read "beware of Dog". As they looked, they saw a mean rotweiller sitting on the porch licking his gonads.

    Cheesey gazed at the dog's festivities and said, "Boy! I wish I could do that".


    to which Montana Bob replied, "Don't you think you outta pet him first?"
     
  6. MontanaBob

    MontanaBob Cheesehead

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    Cheesey was on a trip to the Twin Cities to catch a glimpse of the Vikings empty super Bowl Trophy Case. He got to the middle of the I-94 bridge over the St. Croix river just out of Hudson when his car stalled. (They need gas, Cheesey). As he was waiting for AA to show up, (he forgot the third A) he got hungry and pulled out a bag of Salsa Chips and some cheese.
    "Might as well eat as long as I'm here" he thought. Swimming wasn't an option as the deck level of the bridge was a tad higher than the bar stools he was used to falling off.
    As he got his banquet set up on the hood of his AMC Gremlin, this guy pulls up along side his car and asks if he can help. Cheesey, being right on the ball, recognizes that this guy is VikesRule in the flesh. Before Cheesey can open his mouth, either to speak or shove another chip in it, VikeRule grabs his chips and cheese, hops in his car and takes off.

    When the state patrol got there they found Cheesey running west on the bridge yelling at the top of his lungs to a car now gone into the distance,
    "Hey, that's Nacho Cheese, that's Nacho Cheese!! :lol:
     
  7. wpr

    wpr Cheesehead

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    What no squirrels?
     
  8. MontanaBob

    MontanaBob Cheesehead

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    They saw what Cheesey was trying to do and all died from laughing so hard. Solved my squirrel problem....thanks, Cheesey! :-?
     
  9. trippster

    trippster Cheesehead

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    Cheesey and Vikesrule were driving toward each other one night when the both drifted into the center and hit head on. Terrible stuff. Cheesy flew through the windshield while Vikesrule was thrown out the door.

    As they both got up and dusted themselves off, they realized neither was hurt and how lucky they were. So, sitting on the ground up against the bashed and totaled cars, they discussed their fortune.

    Cheesy said, "hey, I have a bottle of Jack Daniels in the trunk. Let me get it and we can drink to our health and good luck!", to which Vikesrule (a drunken Viking) heartily agreed. Cheesey went to his trunk and pulled out the full bottle of JD and sat back down next to Vikes. "Here ya go my friend, you can be the first," and hands the bottle to Vikesrule.

    Vikesrule takes a few huge gulps of it and polishes off at least a third of the bottle. After taking another swig he holds it out for Cheesey to take his swig.

    To which Cheesey waves his hand and replies, "aww no thanks, I'll just wait til the police get here!"
     
  10. wpr

    wpr Cheesehead

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    Sweet. Great one Trip. I never knew the Cheese Meister was that smart.
     
  11. Zombieslayer

    Zombieslayer Cheesehead

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    :lol:

    Ok, for this one, imagine Cheesey as the bartender.


    A penguin walks into a bar, and goes up to the bartender and asks if anyone has seen his brother.

    The bartender replies, "what does he look like?"
     
  12. wpr

    wpr Cheesehead

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    WHY CHEESEY SHOULD NEVER QUESTION TROMADZ WHEN HE IS DRUNK

    On a Sunday afternoon after Green Bay had once again kicked the Viking's butts, Cheesey was shopping at the local supermarket where he selected:
    A half-gallon of 2% milk
    A carton of eggs
    A quart of orange juice
    A head of romaine lettuce
    A 2 lb. can of coffee
    A 1 lb. package of bacon

    As he was unloading the items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk Tromadz, (remember there had been a Packer game earlier that day)standing behind him watched as he placed the items in front of the cashier.

    While the cashier was ringing up the purchases, Tromadz calmly stated, 'YYYYYou mush be ssshingle.'

    Cheesey was a bit startled by this proclamation, but he was intrigued by the derelict Tromadz' intuition, since at that time he was indeed single. Cheesey looked at the six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about the selections that could have tipped off Tromadz to his marital status.

    Curiosity getting the better of him, as it always does, Cheesey said: 'Well, you know what, you're absolutely right. But how on earth did you know that?'

    Tromadz replied, 'CCCCCause you're uuuugly.'
     
  13. trippster

    trippster Cheesehead

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    cheesey is bartending again.

    A horse comes in. cheesey asks, "why the long face?"

    A hot dog asks Cheesey for a beer to which Cheesey replies, "sorry, we don't serve food here".
     
  14. trippster

    trippster Cheesehead

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    Cheesey married a girl from montana. After the honeymoon he came back alone. Montana Bob said "what happened? wheres your new wife?"
    cheesey : I had to shoot her
    Bob: Why?
    Cheesey: She was a virgin.
    Bob: Oh, ok. yeah, if she wasn't good enough for her family, she sure isn't good enough for yours!
     
  15. Pack93z

    Pack93z You retired too? .... Not me. I'm in my prime

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    Cheesey and Trippster were sitting on a park bench outside the Grafton town hall when a flower show was in progress.

    Cheesey leaned over to Tripp and said, "Cripes! life is boring, we never have any fun these days. For $5.00 I'd take my clothes off and streak through the flower show!"

    "You're on!" said Tripp, holding up five dollars.

    As fast as he could, Cheesey fumbled his way out of his clothes and completely naked, streaked through the front door of the town hall, followed by loud applause.

    Cheesey burst out through the door surrounded by a cheering crowd.

    "Wow, what happened?" asked Tripp.

    "It was great!" Cheesey said, "I won first prize for The Best Dried Arrangement!"
     
  16. PackerChick

    PackerChick Cheesehead

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    Thats another oldie but a goodie.
     
  17. Pack93z

    Pack93z You retired too? .... Not me. I'm in my prime

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    Trippster walks into a bar with Cheesey; Tripp orders a drink and while he's drinking it Cheesey is running wild.

    Chessey jumps up on the pool table and grabs the cue ball, sticks it in his mouth and swallows it whole.

    The bartender is livid and says to the guy, "Did you see what Cheesey just did?"

    "No. What did that Cheesey do this time?" says Tripp.

    "Well, he just swallowed the cue ball off the pool table, whole" says the bartender.

    "Yeah, well I hope it gives him indigestion because he's been driving me nuts" says Tripp.

    Tripp finishes his drink and leaves.

    Two weeks later he comes back with Cheesey.

    Tripp orders a drink and Cheesey starts running wild around the bar again. While tripp is drinking his drink, Cheesey finds some peanuts on the bar. He grabs one, sticks it up his butt, then pulls it out and eats it. The bartender is disgusted.

    "Did you see what Cheesey did now?" he asks.

    "What now?" responds Trippster. "Well, he stuck a peanut up his butt, then pulled it out and ate it" says the bartender.

    "Well, what do you expect?" replied Tripp. "Ever since he ate that darn cue ball he measures everything first!"

    Sorry.. Cheesey.. :lol:
     
  18. MontanaBob

    MontanaBob Cheesehead

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    I'm beginning to sense a "what about Bob" line here with me involved in Cheesey's escapades. I'll be gone until Monday AM so no fair messing with me until then.
     
  19. Pack93z

    Pack93z You retired too? .... Not me. I'm in my prime

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    One day, Cheesey was putting together a puzzle. He was really stumped and very frustrated, so he decided to ask his wife for help.

    "It's supposed to be a tiger!" Cheesey cried.

    "Honey," said his wife, "Put the Frosted Flakes back in the box!"
     
  20. wpr

    wpr Cheesehead

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    Sure all weekend we will be saying "Whatever happened to Bob?"
    Tripp will say, "Didn't you hear?"
    And our posts will be, "No. What?"
    Tripps, reply will be, "Bob and Cheesey went out for a walk. Cheesey had to shoot him." :p
     
  21. Pack93z

    Pack93z You retired too? .... Not me. I'm in my prime

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    Well that is maybe a better than a visual of Cheesey on the porch.. :p
     
  22. IronMan

    IronMan Cheesehead

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    :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
     
  23. cheesey

    cheesey Cheesehead

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    I was TERRIFIED to venture into this thread!!!!!

    My feeling was justified!!!! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
     
  24. PackerChick

    PackerChick Cheesehead

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    Oh, you poor cheesey.
     
  25. wpr

    wpr Cheesehead

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    All right then! This thread has been a success!
     

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