A word of warning

Pokerbrat2000

Opinions are like A-holes, we all have one.
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I farted once in church during the quietest point in the service, sitting alone, the nearest person being at least 20 feet away so I couldn`t blame anybody else.....lol I changed parish shortly after.
Might have been God who farted. You should have pointed up and shrugged.
 

Voyageur

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I lost one once in Church. Before it happened, I'd held back so long that I thought my abdomen was going to burst open. I did my best to press down on the seat for help, and all it did was turn it into a high pitched whistle that could be heard from 30 yards away.

To make matters worse, my Mom, sitting next to me, thought it was intentional, so she gave me a bat along side the ear, and it made a motor boat sound, making matters worse.

That wasn't the worst of it. It was fueled by having eaten over a half dozen deviled eggs the night before. It was a grand one!
 
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This thread is degrading at biblical proportions! :x3:

PS. Did you know that the average person makes 2 pints of gas per day? I read adding sugar induces the effect because it turns you into a fermenting machine. Read that making Wine in College labs. It’s about all I remember. Weird
 

weeds

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I lost one once in Church....

That wasn't the worst of it. It was fueled by having eaten over a half dozen deviled eggs the night before. It was a grand one!
Ah yes ... the deviled egg... those babies are lethal! Usually potent enough to knock a buzzard off of a sh*t wagon, or, make a freight train take a dirt road. I'll ALWAYS take ownership of those little trail blazers.
 

Pokerbrat2000

Opinions are like A-holes, we all have one.
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My guaranteed fuel of choice for a real chair rattler and roof raiser is Cracker Barrel's Biscuits and gravy, with a side of bacon. Now if I want to include the peeling off of all the paint on the house in the experience, I add a stop for a couple of scoops of Babcock's Badger Blast!

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weeds

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*Enters thread* An usual smell is lingering

*walks out*
L.T. enters this literary masterpiece and contributes "The Lingerer" (not to be confused with "The Wanderer", a song by Dion, or, to the unindoctrinated, a little stink bomb that seems to bounce off walls in a contained area in a relatively short period of time, sending the weak of constitution running for open windows - or creating open windows) ... for those of you not in-the-know, the lingerer is a deposit-free introduction of a gaseous hit-and-run.

An example would be when I was in college, I spent one semester living on the 9th floor of a high rise dorm. I managed a bar in college, so I'd get home early in the A.M. after cleaning up the bar. Never failed, someone right before me, probably from 10th would drop one, exit the elevator and send it back down to the ground floor... where "IT" laid in wait.... for young Weeds and his late night date to walk face first into the equivalent of a plate-glass force field.
 

weeds

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My guaranteed fuel of choice for a real chair rattler and roof raiser is Cracker Barrel's Biscuits and gravy, with a side of bacon. Now if I want to include the peeling off of all the paint on the house in the experience, I add a stop for a couple of scoops of Babcock's Badger Blast!

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Seems to me that Badger Blast would be the end product.
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