Jokes

Love it. Love it a lot :rotflmao:

thats great lol

poor poor michael... you all know he's innocent. you're just too obsorbed about with rich and fame that you forget that he deserves the same rights as anybody else.

also i love when he does that high pitched scream.

HE hehehehe!!!

I don't know if he was guilty or innocent........he's just strange!
I wouldn't DOUBT that people would go after him for the money, and try to extort him. I know i have seen many people that were around him (kids) that said he never did anything wrong to them.
I just like the funny joke! :wink:

i know, it's the fact that it's a joke... i'm just stating that if he were anybody else... there wouldn't even be a trial due to his psychological damage.

i do love the "big hand touches the little hand" the most

There is a teacher teaching a class and she says "if 3 birds are on a telephone wire and you throw a rock at 1 how many will be left?" Little Johnny raises his hands and says "there won't be any left cause the other 2 will fly away." She says I like your answer but it's wrong. Then little Johnny goes "Well I have a question for you. There are 3 women on a park bench and they all have ice cream cones. One's licking the cone, one's sucking the cone and one's biting the cone. Which one is married??
She replies "Well it's the one sucking the cone." 'Little johnny goes "No its the one with the ring on her finger but I like your answer!!!!"

See......if I was the kid, i would say........."You didn't say the rock HIT the bird, so all THREE would still be there!" If she came back with "ONE got hit!" I would say "Was there any PETA members around? If so, i'd be in a LOAD of TROUBLE!!!"
See why i always got in trouble at school??? LOLOLOL!!! :lol:
Liked the joke, by the way!!! 8)

lol what an awful joke!

A guy is spending the holidays with his girlfriend’s family. They’re sleeping in separate bedrooms, and one night before they go off to bed the guy starts feeling a little horny.

With an air of confidence, he leans with his hand against the wall and, smiling, he says to her: "Baby, would you give me a *******?"

"Are you crazy?" she says. "My parents will see us!"

Him: "Oh come on! Who's gonna see us at this hour?"
Her: "No, please. Can you imagine if we get caught?"
Him: "Oh come on! There's nobody around, they're all sleeping!"
Her: "No way. It's just too risky!"
Him (horny as hell): "Oh please, please, I love you so much?!?"

This goes on for a minute or two when, out of the blue, the light on the stairs goes on and the girl's little sister shows up in her pajamas. In a sleepy voice she says, "Dad says to go ahead and give him a *******. Otherwise I can do it. Or if need be, dad says he can come down and do it himself. But for ****'s sake tell him to take his hand off the intercom...."

bahahahahaha...

That was a good one Zero!

And Cheesy, lol that was a surprisingly good one from you! Could it be you have started taking joke classes to improve your funniness? :wink:

http://www.youtube.com/v/J_2lM55MYa4

Maybe, your just being around me, has finally raised your awareness as to what is funny, and what is NOT funny! It's like you have spent your life around hot dogs, and NOW have the chance to be around Prime Rib! (ME!) :wink: :lol:
Yeah..........THATS the ticket! LOLOLOL!!! :lol:

roflmao guys!!!!! keep the jokes comin - helps with the tension!!!

and cheesey = prime rib??? hmmm...i don't THINK so, buddy!!!!! you're ground round if i ever saw it!!!!! j/k!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:

Ground round!?!? Ground SIRLOIN at LEAST!!!

How much ground round could a ground hog hog, if a ground hog could hog hog.................or sumthin' like that..........LOLOLOL!!! :lol:

Jack and Jill were going to get married. On the eve of their wedding night, Jack's father sat Jack down for a little man-to-man conversation.

"Jack," he says. "On my wedding night, I sat your mother on the bed, took off my pants and told her to try them on. When she said they were too big, I agreed and told her they always would be. I wear the pants in our relationship and always will. Since that day, your mother and I have never had a problem."

Jack thinks this is a great idea.

The next day, Jack and Jill get married. After the wedding, Jack takes his new bride home and sits her on the bed. Jack then takes off his pants and hands them to Jill.

"Try these on," he says.

"But sweetheart, they are much too big for me," replies Jill.

"That's right," says Jack. "My pants are much too big for you and always will be. I wear the pants in this relationship and I want you to always remember that."

Jill is quiet for a minute. She then goes to the closet, takes out a pair of her pants and hands them to Jack. "Honey, can you please try these on?"

"But I could never get into those!" exclaims Jack.

"Exactly. And if you don't drop that attitude, you never will."