And so they call me the YAM

Yared-Yam

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PATHETIC HUMANS!!

Prepare for a weekly edition of The Yam. This is Part One of two unimaginably amazing section of picks. If you're a betting man you'll ignore the lines and focus on THIS!

Cincinnati @ Baltimore
Let's see. Bengals against Ravens. Bengals are a beautiful form of a feral cat and last time I took an English course I learned that cats eat birds. Also Ocho Cinco won't be stopped. Ravens defense? Please. As a wise man once said, "THE BENGALS WIN!"
BENGALS 37 RAVENS 14

Green Bay @ Buffalo
The Pack is back. At least according to #2 wideout Donny Driver. What do I think? I think that WHEN the Packers win this game I will punch myself in the face. Norman Rockwell is a friend of mine. He once drew a picture of a wonderful posse of clowns posing as hobo's. PACKERS IN A LAUGHER! HAWK COMES UP BIG WITH HIS FIRST DEF. TD!
PACKERS 31 BILLS 10

Miami @ Chicago
How many times must we take this disgrace
Another Bears fan throwing insults in our face
The Packers are the greatest team to ever play the game
Even if from time to time they've been a little lame

How could you ever love a team with Jim McMahon
Not even Porky Pig was as big a ham
They got a reputation that's mostly based on luck
The Bears…Still…Suck

The Bears still suck, the Bears still suck
The Bears still suck, the Bears still suck
They really really really really really really suck
Yes the Bears…Still…Suck - BEARS WIN BIG
BEARS 47 FISH 10

Atlanta @ Detroit
Well let's see here. Vick or Kitna... Vick or Kitna.......DETROIT IS TERRIBLE! VICK GOES NUTS WITH 5TDs(2 on the ground!) ROY WILLIAMS WITH 2TDS IN A LOSS
FALCONS 38 DETROIT 24

Tennessee @ Jacksonville
My beloved Byron Leftwich has been benched. "But for how long?" you may ask me. Ask me! Good question my padawons. The answer is one half. It will only take 2 quarters of football for my love to get his job back from that thief Garrard. TENNESSE GETS AHEAD EARLY, BUT LEFTWICH SUBS IN AND LEADS A HEROIC COMEBACK!
TITANS 24 JACKSONVILLE 27

Houston @ New York(Giants)
Listen here folks. Eli Manning is on my fantasy team. If the Giants don't win or at least go down swinging with huge #'s from my main man, I'll be one FURIOUS statistician. TEXANS SCARE THE GIANTS AND CARR KEEPS HIS JOB FOR 1 MORE WEEK! 3TDs FOR ELI
GIANTS 24 TEXANS 17

Kansas City @ St. Louis - YAM'S LOCK OF THE WEEK
All you have to do for this is look at the stats. The Ram's are 30th in the NFL in rushing YPA(Yards per Attempt) at 4.82; 25th in total rushing yards allowed and 28th in rushing TDs given up. Who do the Chiefs have? Larry Johnson. Game, set, match. LJ GOES NUTS: 185YDS RUSHING 3TDS
CHIEFS 34 RAMRODS 28

More tomorrow!
 

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